What if our challenges with food and body were a gift, here to support us in stepping into a higher version of ourselves?
What if we were invited to surrender and trust that what is in the way IS the way?
My journey with food and body image has been one filled with many twists and turns. And my spiritual quest was, at times, a way of avoiding having to face that I was having problems in these areas – but ultimately, it is what liberated me.
In Buddhism there is an expression: “hungry ghosts”. Their bellies are big, their neck very thin and no matter how much they eat, the hole is never filled. Very often, at the root of our eating challenges there is a void that we are trying to control or fill.
When I heard my teacher Adyashanti saying “If you are trying to stop your mind you will be at war for ever”, I felt the same could be applied to our relationships with our bodies and food.
After decades of fighting myself and trying to find answers through endless retreats, courses and different forms of therapies, I feel I have finally found a sort of peace. My digestion has improved and therefore my health.
Time heals and I never thought that I would find myself at 50, when the body is starting to go through more obvious changes (especially as women) in a more loving relationship with myself. This body is our life companion and when I look back, I feel a lot of sadness at the time wasted comparing myself and treating myself as I did.
So, what do I do?
I sit with my sadness the way I guide my students in yin yoga and in my healing/coaching sessions. I understand the whys, but I also know that how I see myself is my responsibility as it is to treat myself with respect and care.
If I don’t, who will?
I bring curiosity to where I carry my pain, I let a message or a memory come up and I breathe. I remind myself that my true nature is the blue sky and that these feelings, thoughts and emotions are like clouds coming and going. My true nature does not change. When I connect with something bigger than this flesh and bones, I know how vast I am. I also know after decades of spiritual practises that this earth body is the most spiritual experience I will ever have. This body and this life are so precious, and it is our duty to honour these forms.
People will not remember your size but rather how they felt around you. They won’t care about your wrinkles but how you made them feel.
So, my love, take a moment and ask yourself, what is my body trying to tell me? And take one step into that direction. Your body is your ally and never lies. You are healing and you are loved.
Comments